Speech by Shaliza Ladhani (11th October 2006)

PEER PRESSURE!

Have you ever done something that wish you could change? Something you did to fit in? Something all your friends were doing? If yes you've been a subject to peer pressure, if no then consider yourself lucky.

Peer pressure is when friends persuade you to do something, thus the name “Peer Pressure”. This could be something you may or may not want to do, and just don't have the courage to do it and your friends talk you into it. Peer Pressure can be broken down into two areas; good peer pressure and bad peer pressure.

Bad peer pressure is when you are being forced to do something you don’t want to do even though your friend says you should. Since your friends are a big part of your life (even if you don't realize it), just by spending time with you, you learn from them, and they learn from you. It's only human nature to listen to and learn from other people in your age group. Thus they would introduce you to things which you may not want to do. For example if your friends offered you a cigarette, you might want to say no because you know that its bad but you don’t want to be the odd one out. This is when you are being pushed into smoking a cigarette.

I’m sure you all have been in certain situations where you have been forced to do something that you don’t want to do. Peer pressure becomes a problem when you get sucked into something that you really don’t want to do and become addicted to it, such as drugs, alcohol cigarettes etc…

We are old enough to make our own decisions. When some one comes and persuades you to try and take drugs, you should know yourself, and know what’s right and wrong, because after you are addicted you cannot blame any one but yourself.

For instance, say you were going to buy a cell phone. You wouldn't just go out and pick the one that looked nice; you probably would go on to the internet and research about the features etc. You might also ask few friends what they thought. Finally you would go to the store and know that you were making an informed and good decision. In the same situation, before you get sucked into peer pressure, you should research about what you may be getting yourself into.

However, good peer pressure is being pushed to do something you didn’t have the courage to do. Good peer pressure can also be a situation when your friends convince you NOT to do something you were going to do because it wasn’t in your best interest. Knowing who is asking you to do something helps you make a decision. If the person is not your friend, you should really consider what they want you to do, but if you trust and respect this person then you might seriously consider what they ask.

For example, positive peer pressure can be used to pressure bullies into acting better toward other kids. So, it is okay to “follow the crowd” from time to time. But you need to learn to recognize when following the crowd is doing harm than good, either to yourself or others. This is only possible if you know yourself and be true to your inner conscience. There are certain traits that put you at higher risk for falling in to the peer pressure trap. These include: Low self esteem Lack of confidence Uncertainty about ones place within a given peer group No personal interests exclusive of one's peer group Feeling isolated from peers and/or family Lack of direction in life Depression Eating disorders Poor academic abilities or performance Fear of one's peers Lack of strong ties to friends, feeling that friends could turn on you easily or with little reason Close bond with a bully.

However there are also certain things you can do in order to prepare yourself for peer pressure. These include: Know where you stand on key issues like drugs and alcohol and do not allow anybody to make you stray from your position. Do not allow yourself to seek comfort in making other people feel bad or sad, flatly refuse to take part in anything designed to cause harm or distress to another person and speak up when/if such a situation arises. Think of yourself as a leader and act accordingly. The more you see yourself in a leadership role the more comfortable you will feel asserting your own opinions and feelings. Refuse to let yourself down! You can't escape it -- it is everywhere. No matter how popular you are, how well liked you may be or how together you feel, sooner or later you will have to face............ ….PEER PRESSURE!

Please note that views presented by this speech are those of the speaker and do not necessarily reflect those of the Youth Connections Gavel Club.